Fighting?

Since I was diagnosed with cancer, its seems every time I turn the TV on there is something about "fighting" cancer on. Ad, show or something. Honestly, I didn't get it. I didn't feel like I was "fighting" cancer. I have a disease and I'm getting treatment. But, I didn't feel like I was "fighting".

Well, I'm done. If I could run away for a even a few weeks and come back to resume all this, I would. Yea a nice little break would be great right now. But, I can't. And right now I'm pumped up on drugs and feel crappy so my emotions and head are not in the right place. But, I get it. I finally get it now. This will pass by Friday and I'll feel human again and that's when I'll start eating good and exercising like crazy and getting myself in shape and ready for round four. Hmmmm sounds like preparing for a fight.

So yea, I'm fighting cancer. Why did I deny that? What scared me? A fight implies there will be a loser. Ah, there's the kernel of fear.