Failed. Failed big time. Was at the ER from 3am to 9am getting straighten out. Ok so my doc wanted me to try to avoid constipation all together. Bless him for that but, I just don't think that's they way its going to work.
So here's what went down. Senokot like he told me to. Did nothing but give me a progressive gut ache through out the day. Did get some poo to pass but only with the help of glyceryn suppositories. And it was rabbit pellets at best. So by 9pm I go to the Miralax. That just put me over the edge into unbearable gut ache and it made me sick. So now I'm throwing up Miralax, can't poo and have the gut ache from hell. My mom is trying to get me to walk around to get things to move. Which I do but, doesn't produce much movement at all. And I'm throwing up and getting more and more dehydrated. I'm in trouble. Mom says do you think you should go to the ER? Yes but, I can't with the gut ache from hell. Time for the fleets enema. So off dad goes to get one. Now this time I used less that 1/4 of the enema. I don't even know if it was that much. This was smart. It was just enough to move it out, but didn't give me turbo charged diarreah. But, I'm in trouble because I'm dehydrated and still throwing up. So off to the ER we go at 3am. IV. Two liters of saline solution and reglan for the nausea and I'm straightened out. Got some diarreah but, infrequent so right now I'm not doing anything about it. Came home took my emend for nausea, my atvian for nausea and anti anxiety and then crashed. We all crashed.
Chris and my dad went to the ER with me. My mom is my primary care giver at home and I like her staying away from the ER as there are nasty things to be picked up there. Plus she was already up most of the night with me. But, I could tell she felt bad about not going.
Chris did great. I have a great kid. Told him he could leave the room when they set up the IV but he didn't. I don't think he watched, I don't watch. But, he hung in there. Fussed with my blankets and pillow. And read his book. Kept his cool but nothing too exciting was going on.
A part of me hates just hates that he is having to experience this but, he is learning so much. Things that can only be learned by experience. How a hospital works. He knows now the first thing they want is ID and health insurance card. He got it out of my wallet for me and took care of it. Put it all back and became the watcher of my purse for the evening.
When we got home after we all woke up, I asked him if he was scared tonight. He said no, then well a little. I told him its ok to be scared when someone you love is sick. I've seen my mom sick and have been scared its ok. You can be scared and still get what you need to get done done.
With the constipation done, I'm usually over the worst part. Fatigue and no appetite to come but, I know now that by Friday that will pass.
And it came to pass. Favorite Bible verse.
And so it came to pass! Hugs to Chris. Breast cancer, chemo and ERs are scary experiences, but it will influence his outlook and perspective forevermore & I mean that in a good way.
ReplyDeleteYou and your family are so strong!
I know. I personally hate it that ANY kid ANYWHERE has to deal with scary or sad stuff. sigh. But you are right. This is how they learn. I've known since Joshua Tree that Chris is an amazing young man.
ReplyDeleteI also hate the crap you are going through right now, woman. I'm holding space for it to
yield a disappearance of the cancer though.
Melanie
Oh Pam, I am so sorry you are going through this. YOu are so brave and kind to share it, though, so that others can learn. Chris is a great kid and he has a great mom.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Helen
We just don't get through life without the scary stuff. We don't come born knowing how to handle it. Most of us just react. But, if we can learn how to be scared but still function, I think that's better.
ReplyDeleteWhat do I know, I have chemo brain. But, its what I'm telling myself as I watch my son handle this amazingly well.